Tips To Win Back Your Husband. During my first marriage I admit I was very controlling and immature. I acted more like a little girl than a woman and always wanted my way throughout the relationship. I seldom showed my husband trust through my behavior and acted out in harmful and hurtful ways when I didn’t get my way. Due to my unresolved personal issues I took allot of my insecurities and lack of good self-esteem out on him as he was quite established in his career where I was supposedly the “woman behind” the successful man. Not a very good feeling as I knew I had allot of professional potential. As much as I was proud of him and appreciated our life together I was very mean to him and did not show him the thankfulness and appreciation I now know I should have. He left me after years of me verbally abusing him and I was in total shock. It made me realize I needed to make some changes in my behavior and resolve those personal issues that seem to be affecting my relationship.
Whether your husband cheated on you or you exercised really bad behavior toward him where he understandably decided to leave you, here are some tips to help with the process of him wanting to reconcile with you.
1. Don’t do the pursuing. – Leave him alone and give him the opportunity to think. As John Gray, the Author of Men are from Mars Women are from Venus says men need to stretch away from us and go to their cave until they are ready to come out and decide to talk to us.
2. Concentrate on yourself. – Take this opportunity to look at your part in this mess. Talking to a licensed counselor to help sort out the problem areas would be a good start. Counseling can also guide you and help you get the clarity you need to move forward no matter what the outcome.
3. Make yourself attractive. – Don’t feel sorry for yourself and become a recluse. Don’t mope around acting depressed. Keep your appearance up as you never know when you will run into your husband. I remember I was at the post office mailing a package and ran into my estranged husband. I was not dark and gloomy and he said he appreciated my positive disposition as he has always known me to be that way.
4. Keep yourself physically fit.
5. Keep your mind and soul positive. – This is so you continue on with your process to become the Individual you need and want to become. And Differentiate yourself from all unions that have kept you stuck in unhealthy situations that have kept you from being the Individual you are becoming.
Do the necessary work to resolve your personal issues and how they contributed to the relationship. If your husband had an affair, of course it is not your fault he cheated on you. Be open to the possibility that you played a part in causing him to feel the way he feels. That doesn’t make either one of you the bad guy. It just makes you both human.
If done with good integrity and confidence these steps could get your desired results. Keep in mind you have to be dealing with a reasonable person. If your husband is a natural born “jerk” nothing is going to work….and who would want him back anyway?!
If you find yourself in a situation where you have wronged your man and need to repair the damage to get him to want to come back to you or, he cheated and may not want to return to the marriage, please contact me at (858) 735-1139 and we can talk about how you can do what you need to do to make the best choices for yourself.