Premarital Counseling – Do You Really Need It?

Premarital Counseling – Do You Really Need It?  Ahh the June Bride.  How romantic and exciting to have become engaged.  I was getting my nails done the other day and a mother of the bride was at the next stall going on and on about her daughter’s wedding. Right down to the colored napkins at the reception and whether or not they should have menus at each of the sit down place settings. I could tell by her conversation they were putting in a lot of time, energy, and money into the planning.  According to the Knot the average cost for a wedding in 2018 was $33,937.  According to Brides.com the average was $44,000.  As a Marriage Counselor I offer Premarital Counseling to Couples at a fraction of the cost to help make the move toward this joyous occasion. Many couples say they have talked about what their future will be like but haven’t really sat down and discussed what that will look like. There are important topics to be addressed and expectations should be made explicit before making that union legal.  If not, trust me…this will be a good first marriage where you’ll have learned how become an expert for the second. Premarital counseling cost a fraction of what it costs to plan a wedding. Why not include premarital counseling in your wedding plan so your investment makes for long-term happy memories.

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Courtesy of Freedigitalphotos.net and artur84

Don’t Get Married Until You’ve Talked About These Topics:

  • What is your vision for our future?  What does that look like?
  • What are your goals or hopes for the marriage?
  • Who will manage the money and bills?
  • Will we have joint or separate bank accounts?
  • What are your expectations about sex and intimacy?
  • What are your expectations about involvement in religion or spiritual activity?
  • Where will we live?
  • Who will do chores?  How will they be divided?

  • Will we have children?  How many?
  • If we are blending a family, how will this work?  Will we both parent or parent only our own children?
  • How will be participate in the Holidays?  With the in-laws?
  • How will the household operate?  What does that look like?  What are our roles?
  • What are expectations about Individual activities and Couples’ activities?
  • How will we resolve conflict?
  • How will we communicate with each other?
  • And many more…….which are specific to your individual situation
Courtesy of Freedigitalphotos.net and Stuart Miles

Laying down the foundation for your marriage in PreMarital Counseling is worth the time, energy and money you put into the process.  Having a marriage that not only works for you both, but is satisfying and happy is priceless.  It makes more sense to invest in premarital counseling as it can save you money in the long run from seeking the service of a divorce attorney who typically has rates of $450/hr. along with the heartache of splitting up a family.

Couples Counseling with me is time specific where you will be able to talk about what you want your future to look like and acquire the lifetime tools for conflict resolution, being able to effectively communicate, and  to ask for what you need and want from one another for a healthy union. Please contact me at (858) 735-1139 before you actually say “I Do.”

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