Neurology Matters in Couples Therapy

Neurology Matters in Couples Therapy.  If you are married to someone on the Autism Spectrum traditional couples counseling will not help.  My husband has Asperger’s.  We have been married for over 20 years.  As a Marriage and Family Therapist, I always knew there was something off with the way my husband communicated.  I love my husband very much, but the first decade of our marriage was very challenging.  I “acted out” quite a bit as I came to understand I was suffering from Cassandra Syndrome. I don’t know how many times I threatened divorce.

Neurology Matters in Couples Therapy

We sought Marriage Counseling, however, our communication did not improve. My discouragement and frustration lead to more acting out behavior which wasn’t helping. What we needed were relational tools and education about how Neurodiverse couples (Asperger husband; Neurotypical wife) process information differently. The understanding was quite eye opening.

As a Marriage and Family Therapist, and Certified Neurodiverse Couples Counselor, I am able to effectively help Neurodiverse Couples:

  • Identify root cause of issues through a Neurological lens
  • Understand meltdowns in one or both partners and how to manage them
  • By making an assessment using an Asperger’s profile in one of the partners
  • Interpret for each partner what behavior means

  • Acquire tools that initiate communication, express thoughts and feelings, and ask for what is needed
  • Implement those tools
  • Put systems in place for healthier and more effective interaction
  • Understand and appreciate that both have their own perspectives and see things differently

As a Therapist that works with Neurodiverse Couples, I normalize behavior that may be construed as odd and unkind. I know first hand how it feels to be a woman married to a husband on the Spectrum. With education, tools and adding levity to our sessions to difficult situational stories my couples present, we are able to develop and exercise more relational behavior to receive the emotional connection desired.

Many couples have spent thousands of dollars on therapy to no avail. They still feel disconnected, frustrated, and angry. No one wants a divorce. Couples have a lot invested in their relationships. Some have children, they have their history and resources that they want to keep intact. Neurodiverse couples can see the light at the end of the tunnel when they have the tools to communicate. Or as I like to say, tools to relate.

 

For more information about getting the right kind of counseling please contact me at (858) 735-1139.

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