Is Polyamory For You?

Polyamory Personality Traits

polyamory8 20090729-poly2

Polyamory isn’t for everyone.  Most people never stop to ask themselves whether their personal characteristics make them better suited for monogamy or polyamory or for each at different stages of their life.  These days many young people have much more awareness than previous generations that they do have a conscious choice whether or not to practice monogamy.  Polyamory is not solely about having multiple partners as it is a fluid process of checking in with oneself to see what actually feels appropriate with each person in any given situation.  We tend to be influenced by the conditioning received in the families we grow up in or the current social norms.

While heterosexual monogamous marriage is still the ideal in much of the world, subcultures where polyamory, homosexuality or bisexuality are the norm are becoming more visible and gaining respectability.  More people are deciding to remain single or to live together without getting married.  This is especially true if they choose to not have children.  So is polyamory for you? Personality traits for polyamory lifestyles can be complex and demanding.  It requires a high level of self-awareness and interpersonal skills than with monogamy which according to “Deborah Anapol” include:

1.   A talent for intimate relating

2.   High self esteem

3.   Ability to multi-task

4.   A love for intensity

5.   Appreciation for diversity

6.   Communication skills

7.   An independent streak

8.   Team spirit

9.   Commitment to growth

10.  Sex positive

11.  Flexible, creative, and spontaneous

12.  High intelligence

13.  Accountability

14.  Eliminate power struggles


Polyamory means having simultaneous close emotional, and possibly sexual relationships with two or more other individuals with the knowledge and consent of all partners concerned.  The growing practice of polyamory in the United States indicates a significant shift in the way marriage and intimate relationships have evolved over the past few decades.  Couples Couseling can be a venue in which to discuss whether polyamory is something you want to incorporate into your lifestyle.  If you are interested in more information about polyamory and if it may be a lovestyle choice for you, please contact me at (858) 735-1139 or email me at

Share and Enjoy !