Women And Their Right To Sexual Pleasure. With moving into the 21st Century women are becoming more and more empowered in having a voice. Growing up in the 60’s we had the sexual revolution where the hippies of those days were considered immoral and lacking decent boundaries when it came to adhering to societal norms. During that period of time sexual behavior was no different than as it is today, except sexual populations are open and society is more tolerate of them hoping to normalize what the sexual revolution intended, in positive ways. What people do with their sex lives is their business as long as they are of no harm to themselves or others.
As a marriage counselor, I work with women who want to enjoy their sex life by giving them some sexual intelligence. Throughout history men’s pleasure has been prioritized, often times at the expense of women’s pleasure and even consent. With various women’s movement and the increased awareness of sex positive feminism women are asserting their own sexual pleasure. To do this women need to understand their own desires. Because of the ways in which we are taught and socialized it is difficult to ask for what we want when it comes to having an orgasm. There are different kinds of sex. According to Planned Parenthood, the different kinds of sex include:
Vaginal sex (penis in vagina intercourse)
Oral sex (mouth to genital contact)
Anal sex (penis in butt intercourse)
Fingering or hand jobs (hand to genital contact)
Dry humping or genital rubbing
Masturbation (touching yourself)
In determining your desires it would be good to begin your own sexual empowerment journey. Ask yourself the following questions:
- What turns you on
- What kind of pleasurable sensations do you like best
- Do you masturbate – do you know how to masturbate – are you comfortable doing so
- Have you tried masturbating while having sex with your partner
- Do you know how to ask for what you like
- Do you know what you want during sex
- Any shame about your desires
- Any shame about the noises you make
- Do you compare yourself to supermodels and become intimidated
- Do you believe you have the right to your pleasure
Depending on how you grew up sex is typically shame-based, and stems from the belief that it is dirty and sinful. When you can learn the answers to your questions and learn to let go of the shame, embarrassment, and the negative belief that you don’t have a right to your own sexual pleasure you can experience a sexual awakening. Some people never do and will never experience the pleasure that those who do talk about.
For more information on claiming your right to pleasure and developing a sexual empowerment journey contact me at (858) 7835-1139.